Life .....a Whirlwind of events!!
Whirlwind, you may ask why? Great question!! Absolutely fabulous. My life went from a summer of relaxation and family time to a September of running and spinning and programming and organizing and meeting and no family time. (okay very little) This is a frustrating thing because I am not sure what not to do and what to do and how to keep the wife and child happy all at once. I admit I am still a rookie at this Youth Pastor thing and so I am still learning but I thought I had some of this stuff figured out. Last post I wrote about what being a youth pastor is but never included the most frustrating part. Well, well, I think I got it. Today I figured it out but I am not convinced yet that just being a youth pastor is at fault and that I alone have this problem.
So for those of you smarty pants out there with all the experience and know how. What should a new dad and relative newbie do in this situation? How do I find enough time for everything? Or tell me this will end after September?
md
So for those of you smarty pants out there with all the experience and know how. What should a new dad and relative newbie do in this situation? How do I find enough time for everything? Or tell me this will end after September?
md
posted by YootguyMark at
1:08 PM
10 Comments:
It will never end you are doomed....
By
Paul, at 4:12 PM
Just kidding...sit down with your Sr.Pastor and ask him to help you prioritize your schedule...Jeff is really helpful cause he was the youthpastor here before so he is very quick to tell me, you dont need to do that...or you should focus here...that way the leadership in your church is all on the same page!
By
Paul, at 4:14 PM
I hear you and wish that a senior pastor could help but here it is .....we do not have a senior pastor at the church at the moment so ....well....yah!! It would be great to bounce a few ideas off of and hear some feedback.
md
By
YootguyMark, at 6:07 PM
actually it's true it will never end - you are doomed...
the only weapon you have is that your job can be almost as flexible as you want.
So sit down with your woman and tell her to tell you what she wants from you then adjust your schedule to that then tell her that she should not be schlep and bother you about certain times when things get crazy busy. Like right now...
having your wife 'buy in' to your ministry and the spontenaity and business it brings is huge.
Once i tried telling Char that i could be trucker...
oh yeah once you have read this comment please delete it immediately as i do not want Char or Bonnie reading it
not that they usually do but you know how things go
out
By
Increasing..., at 6:44 PM
oh yeah and to bad about the senior pastor thing - of course you could be doing staff meetings out
By
Increasing..., at 6:45 PM
schlep this mark...it's not gonna work. she'll never be happy about the amount of time you get to spend together but she will come to realize that having a flexible schedule like yours is amazing. especially when the baby is sick and crying all day and bonnie has had it and you can come home for 2-3 hours in the afternoon so she can nap or better yet you take the little punk back to work with you! or ben has a class party and you scoop icecream and play games with his classmates for the afternoon. kids LOVE playing in the gym unsupervised so bring the gaffers to work a lot. but sex is out. if you want it - BE HOME A HALF HOUR BEFORE SHE IS TOO EXHAUSTED FOR IT!!! that means no showing up at home after 10 pm! (and no lame excuses for showing up later than that like you had to 'counsel' one of your sponsors about their sex life) and give her 2 nights a week of your undivided attention. that means no company over or going to someone else's house. this is your time together and family time. get a babysitter one of those nights or drug the kid heavily. make popcorn and play backgammon in bed. remember 2 nights a week! sorry bonnie - we talked about this a while back and it really is a big adjustment.
By
Anonymous, at 8:05 AM
As a youth pastor's wife, I think I should put in my two cents....
I know, it never seems like enough time with your family. Especially when I'm at home full time I start to get really lonely if Paul is gone a lot of the evenings. But remember that quality is as important as quanity. Its important that you don't give her left-overs, but that you give her your best. I like it when Paul puts Sasha to bed and spends some time reading with him. I also like it when Paul comes home and we spend time right when he gets in the doorway talking about our days. Another good way to spend time together is to do the regular day stuff as a team. Cook supper together and do dishes side by side. Anyway, I truly believe that Youth Pastor's are not the craziest people out there - it's their wives who are really crazy!
Say hi to Bonnie for me!
By
highestform, at 5:54 PM
look what you started...
By
Increasing..., at 10:30 AM
Thanks everyone for your prticulars on how and when to spend time with my wife and son. It has worked itself out a little better in the past few days and I am sure it will get even better when the month is over. I do appreciate the comments of all you more experienced youth types.
By
YootguyMark, at 12:25 PM
I've got this one all figured out, ask Nicky. I am always home when I say I will be, I never spend wasteful time at Church (like commenting on blogs), I am always "all there" when I am home...wait, that's what Gary Smalley says I am like once I learn the 5 Languages of Love.
I got permission to have other people do my job, that really helps. Volunteers do a lot of my work around here, freeing me up to do what I want at Church and to be at home occasionally.
By
Trevor, at 8:43 AM
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